Fuzzydragons

Trip to maxillofacial today to get Botox in my jaw muscle to try to gt it to relax so I can eat again without pain. Apparently this can happen 6-12 months after TMJ replacement because the muscle is in the way and it gets cut/damaged and when it is repairing itself, it gets really tight and hurts to chew on that side. Didn't happen with the right side replacement, unlucky with the left. Might need another dose after 6 months if it isn't feeling right, but that should be it. Didn't really hurt to get the injections, (3), hurts a bit now tho :/ Todays sketch of a tiny salt grinder. Not exactly drawn straight, but its a 5 minute sketch so it will do.

Back to typing with one hand again because my left is out of commission for awhile. I ended up going to the out of hours GP last night I was in so much pain, and after 2 GPs saw me they figured out I don't have just carpal tunnel I also have Cubital tunnel syndrome . yay...Do you know how hard it is trying not to bend your wrist and elbow?lol So,probably not going to be able to do a lot of art unless its digital until the problems are fixed. Which is OK since I need the practice with a lot of different programs.

I  know I have posted this photo of me before but I wanted to post it again so people could see it and show what my hand use to look like with the extra pinky finger. I am having problems with my left hand more than usual, so back to the Drs about it and the problem with that area where the extra finger use to be, is that the joint closest to the base of my hand is loose. Not dislocated but moves around more like it wants to dislocate. So, when it really hurts that is what is happening, nothing to do but deal with it really. Now that the Doc showed me and had me feel what it is doing, I am always feeling the joint moving and I should stop tho since it hurts lol And in other news, I have Carpal Tunnel in my left hand, which is odd since I am right handed. But said it could be from so many things and to try splints first before possibly having to go the surgery route. And who thought yellow against a blue background would work?? lol

I hate taking these, even if they might help. They are so bitter and keep me up the whole time I am on them, so wont sleep for 5 days. I don't talk about the MS a lot on the blog, because that would get very boring, very fast since it is something that is always there. But I am taking these because I am experiencing the MS hug , which feels like my lungs are in a vice that is always turning. Its lots of fun :p So on the bad side, feeling like crap because of the steroids, but on the plus side might get a lot of work done since I wont be sleeping a lot lol

You can clearly see the gold implant in my eyelid here and I am not a vain person that gives a damn about that, but its frikken being really painful right now. Like I am getting poked in the eyelid with a needle, so really glad I have an appointment this week to see the people who put it in. If the only option I have is to take it out, out it comes, even if that means my vision goes back to being blurry. Too painful to leave in.

Thankfully the stitches are finally out as of yesterday since they were starting to bug me and itch. On the bad side tho, taking them out seems to have worsened the MS flare up I had from the surgery so my walking has gone to hell, but that should start to get better again since I don't have any surgeries planned for awhile lol I just look like I am limping more or am drunk, stumbling around. You can see the little piece of gold actually, well were it is in my eyelid. The bruising on my eyelid has pretty much faded, except near my eyelashes. Looks like badly done eyeliner :p

Yay! Only spent 12 hours at the hospital, (4 hours too long....) but at least I am home. I look like I was in a boxing match lol and lost. People might wonder why I post photos of surgeries, but there are a few reason. One: If someone might be going to have the same surgery, they can see what might happen after. And to tell the truth, my eye doesn't hurt unless I forget and go to touch it. Two: I have a crap memory lol So posting the photos helps me to remember what it use to look like and what happened. Three: Some people actually want to see the photos. Horror movie fans maybe? :p But so people have something to see that might bring a smile to their face. have a baby goat being a dick ;p And now onto the photos  3  2 1 Front view, doesn't look too bad, def. starting to bruise. Side view (need to pluck my eyebrows lol) And another front view. Its turning a lovely purple colour :p  Now to just wait to get the stitches out.

  Well, 72 days if I did the math right since jaw surgery . The scar is looking good and my hair has grown back about an inch where they shaved it, (not that you could tell it was shaved unless I pointed it out in the first place). Face is still numb, and painful to touch. And drooling is fun....TMI?? meh :p I can open my jaw better than I could before but too painful to actually chew anything on my left side. Could be nerve damage, could be because I need a root canal on the 20th, time will tell. Still getting a small piece of gold in my eyelid to try to help it close properly, which I can't wait for since it will hopefully also help with my vision being able to use my eyelid the way it should work, (being able to blink properly). So its good I can open my mouth properly now, but the nerve damage (burning, tingling feeling), is def. worse this time.

Thats how much the little piece of gold they want to put in my eyelid would roughly cost if I was to buy that weight in gold lol 1.2 grams to help keep my eyelid closed. No pictures because, eww they are not nice to look at, even tho they would just be cutting a slit into my eyelid, its still eww :p The problem of not being able to close my eyelid might go away before the surgery, but if it doesn't, gravity and the little piece of gold help the lid to stay shut. Met someone today actually in the x-ray department who had the same thing done and she said it helped a lot. Once they do the surgery I will have a black eye for a bit they say, so will probably get some odd looks and question about who I've been fighting :p

So its been exactly a  month since my TMJ replacement and while the scar is looking good, my vision is still messed up. Plus I think I have a cracked/broken tooth but it will be months before that can be even looked at properly, so yay :p I don't regret doing it, don't think that, never mind I didn't have a choice in it because of how bad it was getting, just a little annoyed since the pain has flared back up. Its still bruised, which is odd but doesn't show up in photos oddly enough. So happy that its been a month and the scar is looking good, not happy since the pain has come back. Anyway a photo update of the scar :) I can't really touch my face without it feeling like I am being prodded with a cattle prod, hence why there is still dried blood in places. Swelling has gone down, another good point, just a pain in the butt to have to go back to eating yogurt all the time :p

So, its been 17 days since I had my jaw joint replaced. Healing good and I can eat bread now. Well, I can eat it very very slowly and only if I squish it :p but its a start. The nerves on my face are going haywire trying to repair themselves. So while it is frikken painful its a good sign, still look like half my face is frozen tho. My vision is still fuzzy and still need drops, but there are signs that is improving too, as long as I don't read too much and strain my eyes. Which sucks when you are as much of a reader as I am. The area where the stitches are is looking good, hard to say how much of a scar it will be now. I'm thinking more than the last time due to how the cuts where sewn shut but time will tell with that. Anyway pic update, puppies before the photo as usual :p 3 2 1 The muscle on my neck is still really swollen, feels like a huge lump when you touch it. I need to dye my hair :p

So its been 10 days since my jaw surgery, the stitches came out on Thursday, so it is much easier now to move my neck even tho I still can't move it normally. Due to nerve damage I cannot close my left eye all the way, doesn't close about 2-3 mm so my vision is really blurry even with glasses on. Should get better, if not I am doomed to a life of eye drops and an eye patch. Here is a photo update after the stitches, with more puppies before and after. 3 2 1  Some people might be wondering why I post about my jaw but not the MS . I think its because to me, the MS while a pain in the backside, its something I deal with every day so don't consider it a big deal. Its always there, so if I did post about it, it would be all the time and that would get boring and grate on people's nerves. The problems I have had with my jaw, more specifically my TMJ , are not talked about a lot and really some people often think the problems they have are normal...

One of the menus from my hospital stay at Ninewells, or as some people refer to it, Ninehells. There is nothing on here I can eat, between not really being able to chew anything and being lactose intolerant, the cafeteria staff seem to be unable to feed me. So we just brought our own soya yogurts. You would think they would have something a person just having had jaw surgery could have. The food when I could eat after other surgeries was never very good anyway, even tho it is supposed to have improved. At least they got rid of the clear soup they had: A stock cube, usually a chicken one in water. Yeah that sounds filling :p but on the other hand I could have drunk that lol

So I ended up only spending 2 and a half days in the hospital this time instead of the 4 and a half with the last jaw surgery. No problems this time thankfully and I seem to be able to open my mouth a bit,  unlike last time where I really couldn't open it at all, but that could be from taking Oxycodone stopping the pain. Now my whole face is numb not just one side :p Looks like I went 10 rounds with Tyson tho :p Pic below of cut, not really bloody or anything, just looks bad but first have a happy puppy :D And look away now if you don't 1 2 3 And here have another puppy :D

This isn't the best Xray of my teeth since I can't really get the little Xray things in my mouth for the usual Xrays, can't even use the small kid ones :p So this was done with the machine the turns around your head to get an Xray. No wonder my face was so swollen when you see how many screws they had to drill in my jaw. Thought it was really neat to see, and yes, I have horrible teeth :p

I had every intention of getting this tiger finished today, but nope lol Did go to a maxillofacial to try to figure out why my jaw hurts so much after the injections into the jaw joint, when it hasn't hurt the last few times I had it done. So, they think that I got a haematoma from the injections, and it hurts when I close my mouth because it puts pressure on it. So back to a soft diet, lots of smoothies and soup at least until the 7th of April when my next appointment is. yay.... well on the bright side, just think of all the weight I will lose :p I really,really don't want jaw surgery again, that was not fun. Did manage to work a bit on a eagle lino print tho, so the day wasn't completly art free :)

So I had a nice flight last night :p I do fall a lot but this is the first time in awhile where blood has been involved. Thankfully just scrapped my hand and bruised my fingers, but can't really draw because of where the scrapes are :/ My knees are nice shades of blue and purple, makes walking fun. Could be worse, could have broken something when I fell, but not going to be able to draw a lot for a few days until my hand heals over. I just trip over my own feet, partly because I can't feel them, partly because I am just a clutz lol Well, it gives me an excuse to get lots of reading done, and try to get caught up with my reading list.

So had a fallow up appointment at maxillofacial  for my jaw, and I can open my mouth 25mm which is a huge improvement and the doctor I saw, (the head huncho in the department who I was surprised to see because he is so busy), he seemed  very happy with everything. Told him about how when I eat on the right side where that joint was replaced I get an electric shock just like the feeling in my face, perfectly normal so thats good at least. from this site This is pretty much what my jaw looks like now and it was so swollen because of all the screws needed. Looking for this photo I did come across some pretty bloody looking photos of the surgery. I have no problem watching slasher/horror movies but I have a problem looking at those photos. Probably because I had the surgery and don't want to see how it was done :p And the scar is fading :) Not that I am really that concerned, I have a lot of scars already and I think they tell a story.

  And more art done from my MRI.Simple painting, but I still managed to get paint all over my hands, and all over the desk. I am not a painter :p The board was actually painted a Neon orange, but it didn't scan very well, and even after messing around in Photoshop, it doesn't look right, so I am crossing my fingers there is enough light tomorrow to get a good photo to show the colours properly.

  And the cuts look OK.The red discolouration has gone down, still bruised and swollen in some places, but nowhere near as bad as it was at first.   My ear looks dirty :p Sort of hard to clean in front of my ear hard enough to scrub at dried blood since that area is pretty sensitive, but it does get cleaned lol This cut should fade away almost completely, and what might be left will just follow the curve of my ear. I can eat soft food now, even chicken surprisingly but it just take a long time to eat. Sitting there an hour later eating noodles :p Good and bad news about the pins and needles feeling I am getting in my face; good news is that it probably means the nerves are waking up and my face wont be numb forever; bad news, it could go on for months. Last visit at the docs, I could open my mouth 2cms, which while not good, is better then the 1.5cms  I was at 3 years ago when I first went to see them.